YOU WILL ALL GET THE SAME THING ON YOUR BIRTHDAY FROM NOW ON.
HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY, IT’S YOUR BIRTHDAY DAY TODAY! A YEAR OLDER AND YOU’RE BOLDER THAN ANY OTHER DAY. DON’T GET BUNDLED UP, IN ALL THE DELICIOUS CAKE. YOU’LL NEED TO TAKE A BREATHER OLD MAN, DON’T FORGET TO TAKE A BREAK!
No, I’ll just put everything in my pocket.
Frantic googling for answers.
It just so happens that Maya 2012 is a program name as well as an end of the world event. Unfortunately…

IS NOT. WHAT I NEED. I have spent thirty minutes in a rage over google being a bastard.

I HAVE FOUR HOURS LEFT.
I’M GOING TO DIE.





